Profile In Douchebag: Richie Rich

There are many jerkoffs within the crumbling House of Bush to loathe. Some have inexplicably been given positions of responsibility over the lives of their fellow citizens, who actually have to do something for a living besides grift the working class. Some, like Pierce Bush, the son of S&L thief/Moonie bootlicker/call-girl customer Neil, are merely the latest generation of useless bastards from a clan that never should have been given a chance to run anything in the first damned place.

Pierce, who recently transferred from Georgetown to UT Austin to continue his major of being an upper-crust parasite, apparently fancies himself as knowledgeable about world events n' stuff. There is currently a bit of a buzz about a letter to the editor of the Houston Chronicle, complaining about how Unca George's little deal with Dubai got squashed (or at least diverted).

When the political firestorm over Dubai Ports World broke out last month, President Bush's nephew sent the Houston Chronicle an electronic letter to the editor, defending his uncle's drive to allow the United Arab Emirates company to buy a firm that helps run six U.S. ports.

To the University of Texas at Austin student, opposition to the deal — it had been approved by the administration before being scuttled Thursday — sent an "ignorant and offensive" message that the owners were being discriminated against because they are Arab. The protests of Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist, R-Tenn., and other congressional leaders seemed "racially prejudiced," he said in the letter, which the Chronicle published.

Yeah. It's not that people are weirded out by the DPW deal just because, um, two of the 9/11 hijackers were from there, al-Qaeda had used Dubai's banks to launder and move funds, and Dubai's royal family were tight with bin Laden and the Taliban. No. It's because they're Arab. Right. Sit down and shut up, Opie.

"I'm not writing them because the president's my uncle," Pierce Bush, who turns 20 this month, said in a telephone interview. "It's kind of my own opinion separately. I'm a strong supporter of my uncle's values."

One of his family's strengths, he said, is that it accepts differing points of view. If he disagreed with one of the president's decisions, he said, he would be free to voice his opposition.

But would he be dashing off letters to the editor if they were critical of his uncle?

"In terms of him being pissed at me, I don't think it would be a good idea. In fact, I guarantee it wouldn't be," said the collegiate Bush, who's unsure if the president is aware of his letters. "If he was against the ports deal, I don't know if I would've written the letter."

Let's hope that UT has some sort of logic and reason class for li'l Pierce, so's he can sort out the serious contradictions in his own statement there. He says it's "kind of [his] own opinion separately", but also immediately iterates his strong support of his uncle's values, which apparently include running the country into the ground, starting wars for no goddamned reason, and watching old people die in their attics and pretend that no one saw it comin'. But whatever. The bottom line is that he had nothing new to add to the argument, by his own admission, yet felt compelled to add his extremely biased 2¢ to the mix.

And best of all, he admits that if his own coveted free n' fair opinion hadn't jibed with Unca Dubya, why he'd have just kept his piehole shut. Too bad he didn't follow that instinct to begin with. But you know, either you're speaking as a member of your political family, or you're speaking as an average concerned American. Pick one, you smug little shit.

It is indeed odd, watching Bush frantically try to resuscitate this fucking ports deal, all while ignoring the rather obvious argument that perhaps we ought to be taking care of it ourselves, if we're so damned concerned about security. The nebulous issue of "cost" keeps getting brought up as a reason why not, but I'll be damned if I've seen any numbers at all on the subject. And anyway, could it possibly be more than the $1 bn per week we spend in Iraq?

But the more you look at this, the more it makes sense -- Junior's reluctance to discuss the deal (now that he, uh, knows about it, that is), and why Pierce might be so darned concerned as well.

Seems that Pierce's daddy has some bidness deals with Dubai as well:

In October 2001, shortly after the United States began bombing Afghanistan, Neil attended an international technology conference in Dubai. He was fishing for investors for his latest business venture -- Ignite Incorporated, an interactive education software company that he founded in March 1999. Ignite says its goal is to help students improve their standardized test scores. And that's where No Child Left Behind comes into play.

Neil Bush's company sells software to prepare students to take comprehensive tests required under "No Child Left Behind." Schools that fail the tests will face termination of federal assistance. The contracts for these test programs are very lucrative. Ignite is currently running a pilot program at a Middle School in Orlando, Florida--where Neil's brother Jeb is governor. The company hopes to sell the software throughout Florida at $30 per pupil per year.

In mid-February, Houston school board members unanimously agreed to accept $115,000 in charitable donations that would be funneled to Ignite. The Houston Independent School District trustees had initially delayed a vote on the matter in December, saying they were concerned that Bush's Austin-based company might be benefiting from his family name. But in February, the nine board members approved the funding without discussion.

So gee whiz, I guess it's just Pierce Bush's personal ethics system which compels him to boldly speak out on this issue of all things. Not his uncle's dwindling political capital and penchant for massive fuck-ups. Not his daddy's bidness deals with the same people. Nope. He just cares so much. Plus, you know, why exactly is it "news" what the spoiled punk nephew of an unpopular preznit thinks about anything, much less matters of national security?

Let it also be noted for the record that this morning's Today Show interview with this little prick was conducted by none other than Campbell Brown, who just happens to be engaged to former CPA and current White House spokes-tool Dan Senor. Perhaps someone should convene a blogger ethics panel about all these fine journamalistic conflicts of interest. Start with Brown and continue through Tweety and Timmeh. There's plenty of digging to be done there, as evidenced by the clear skew of the latter two's usual guest panels.

I can't find a transcript of it yet, but I'd swear that I heard Brown ask Pierce about possible future political aspirations. Ordinarily I'd say I don't see how that could possibly happen, but then I thought the 2000 candidacy of W was a bad joke. I didn't see how that could happen, because I didn't realize just how badly his backers and his fixers wanted it. W came off as back-slapping idiot in that introductory campaign, a mediocre governor of a state that has very limited gubernatorial powers in the first place. And sure enough, he's proven himself to be just that, a glad-handing moron.

Rather than continue his sorry family's dynastic pretension, I think that Pierce will follow in his daddy's footsteps instead of his uncle's. He'll be a lackey to the powerful, a butt-boy for the distributors of thick envelopes who really run the world. He'll be a smooth corporate shill to the Moons and the sheiks of the world, people who literally think they have the divine right to run everybody else's lives. After all, he can relate.

Oh, and by the way, Piercy, if you agree with your uncle's policies so much, remember you're always free to sign up and help fight the War On Terra.