You've Got Mailman

You know, I always figured Karl Malone for a dick, but banging eighth-graders while he was in college exceeds my expectations.

Writes Allen Wilson of the Buffalo News: “His mother, Gloria Bell, reportedly was only 13 years old and Malone a college sophomore at Louisiana Tech when Demetrius was born. Malone might have served jail time had her family asked the district attorney to file criminal charges.”

Malone had no involvement in the rearing of the child. They first met when Demetrius Bell was 18, and Malone reportedly said to him that it was too late to be his father, and that Bell would have to “earn his money on his own.”

Classy with a capital K.