Black Friday Blues

Ask about our killer deals on vacuum cleaners and DVDs -- or just break down the doors and eat our brains.

Guess the stampeding animals at that Wal-Mart forgot about the surveillance cameras:

Police were reviewing video from surveillance cameras in an attempt to identify who trampled to death a Wal-Mart worker after a crowd of post-Thanksgiving shoppers burst through the doors at a suburban store and knocked him down.

Criminal charges were possible, but identifying individual shoppers in Friday's video may prove difficult, said Detective Lt. Michael Fleming, a Nassau County police spokesman.

Other workers were trampled as they tried to rescue the man, and customers stepped over him and became irate when officials said the store was closing because of the death, police and witnesses said.

At least four other people, including a woman who was eight months pregnant, were taken to hospitals for observation or minor injuries. The store in Valley Stream on Long Island closed for several hours before reopening.

Police said about 2,000 people were gathered outside the Wal-Mart doors before its 5 a.m. opening at a mall about 20 miles east of Manhattan. The impatient crowd knocked the employee, identified by police as Jdimytai Damour, to the ground as he opened the doors, leaving a metal portion of the frame crumpled like an accordion.

"This crowd was out of control," Fleming said. He described the scene as "utter chaos," and said the store didn't have enough security.

Dozens of store employees trying to fight their way out to help Damour were also getting trampled by the crowd, Fleming said. Shoppers stepped over the man on the ground and streamed into the store.

It's just too bad one of the cops didn't have the presence of mind to start truncheoning and tasering all within reach. The store "didn't have enough security" because, you know, it never occurred to them that hordes of zombies would show up to literally break down the door and trample the workers, for a deal on a flat-screen.

It's easy to blame Wal-Mart for hyping this nonsense -- and what kind of moron needs to even be reminded about Black Friday anymore? -- but the blame rests squarely with these, eh, I don't know what they are. They're not human beings or people, that's for sure. May they spend this and every future Christmas on a frozen sidewalk. Razing the building with these lunatics inside might have been a good start.