Seriously, leave a freakin' comment once in a while, would it kill ya? "How's it hangin', Heywood?" "Oh, ya know, long and hairy and hard to carry," that sort of thing. Or talk to each other, like I hear they do at other places.
Maybe I should just focus on saying deliberately controversial, obtuse, Fixed Noise type opinions, just to piss people off. "Lance Armstrong is just misunderstood!" or "Soledad O'Brien is stealing my soul through the teevee!". Things like that. Then people might start confusing me with Tracy Morgan. That's when shit starts getting interesting.
Or hey, have you downloaded and read my totally free book, Mockalypse? Did you like it, did you hate it, did you print it out just so you could wipe your ass with it? Is it the 51st shade of grey? I've received some interesting comments so far, but you can't have too many.