On the Origin of Feces

They tell us that we lost our tails, evolving up from little snails. I say it's all just wind in sails. Are we not men? -- Bob Casale, RIP

There are days where you just have to wonder and/or conclude that there are simply too many dipshits cluttering the planet, wasting precious resources, polluting the gene pool, and that a bloodbath (volcano, megatsunami, deadly flu pandemic, airplane fuselages dropping from the sky, etc.) might really be a cleansing.

I don't what to make of fucktards like this animal, except to pray to a non-existent god that it doesn't reproduce, ever. I feel immense waves of pity for whatever unfortunate creature (probably roadkill or a slow-moving farm animal) that it chooses to stick its tiny, nasty junk into. Its parents must be proud, so proud. Read the rest of its Twitter, this is a card-carrying moron that barely shows up to what sounds like an entry-level shelf-monkey job it's barely qualified for.

This is the sort of halfwit that exemplifies what David Simon famously said about there now being more people than there are productive things for them all to do. Which is all well and good; at some point in this blessed "post-scarcity" society, we have to start thinking about big-picture things like this, what to do with inbred belligerents -- people who simply do not and will never add any value to the planet, their communities, or even their own families -- besides doping them up with Ow My Balls! video soma and such like.

But this guy, I'd pay good money to watch him head into Compton or Oakland or South Side Chicago or some such, try that "nigga" shit out there. In the meantime, maybe we start thinking about ways to pay these ass-smoking dipshits not to breed. There are more than enough of them already.