Friday, August 01, 2008

Sausage Party

Live from the Ninth Circle of Hell, it's conservatard gay porn. Bear horrific witness to the grasping, sweaty daisy chain of ideological inbreeding:

[JUNIOR]: [expletive deleted] George W. Bush calling to congratulate you on 20 years of important and excellent broadcasting.

RUSH: Well, thank you, sir. You've stunned me! (laughing) I'm shocked. But thank you so much.

[FREDO]: That's hard to do.

RUSH: (laughing) I know, it is.

[SHRUBBY]: I'm here with a room full of admirers. There are two others that would like to speak to you and congratulate you, people who consider you ...

... friends and really appreciate the contribution you've made.

RUSH: Thank you, sir, very much. Put 'em on.

[CAP'N CODPIECE]: How you doing? This is my swan song? If this is all you got for me, I'm moving on.

RUSH: (laughing) No! The show's yours; take as much time as you want.

[NUMBNUTS]: Well, I'm just calling along with [Daddy Codpiece] and [the slightly less stupid and mendacious sibling]. We're fixing to have lunch here, and I said, "Listen, we ought to call our pal and let him know that we care," for you. So this is as much as anything, a nice verbal letter to a guy we really care for.


Yep, they was all jes' a-fixin' ta haves them some vittles, an' Paw sez, "Hey! Let's have us one-a them thar call-ins ta thuh El Rashbo show! Shee-it!" You gotta read the whole thing (make sure to have a bucket handy just in case) to appreciate the full-on mutual four-way ass-sucking glory of it. These people suck so bad, the light from suck takes several years to reach them.

Even more hammy and artless than Fredo's fake spontaneity at throwing a bone to their favorite propaganda arm, is his ludicrously obvious segue into Dummycrat/Obama bashing. Gee, didn't see that one comin' up the road, asshole. Real subtle, just like all the cringeworthy salad-tossing going on.

And of course Junior's in "high spirits". He always is, always will be. Things have worked out perfectly swell for him and his. Lucky sperm swims in its own pond. There was never any doubt about that outcome. Thanks to shameless cheerleaders like Limpballs, and more "conventional" enabler bozos, he never quite got the full measure of what he deserves from a truly adversarial media.

Whatever. Barring unexpectedly swift justice from The Hague, the next best punishment for these evil cretins is to permanently disengage their vile dynasty and its downstream proxies from any position of responsibility ever again. Let's start there.

No comments:

Post a Comment