McCain Campaign Stays Mainly in the Lame

Looking back at the waste and debris that comprises the 2008 Republican campaign, perhaps the most striking feature is how consistently inept and incoherent it has been. It has not been a coordinated campaign with an actual mesage, so much as a series of disconnected weekly stunts and gimmicks.

None of these stunts and catch-phrases have made it beyond what marketing weasels would call "early adopters", but in the political arena are simply (to be charitable about it) true believers. They'll believe whatever they're told, because they're predisposed to. The effective campaign is the one that can move its message beyond that first layer of self-selecting dopes, but all you see at these "events" is the same idiots with their "I Am Joe the Plummer"[sic] signs, proving on several levels that they indeed slept their way through the public school system.

So when I read a breathless, gushing chronicle of McCain appearing in Denver with by far the most famous face of that city's NFL franchise, I instantly wonder what the numbers are. After all, Obama just drew 100,000 in St. Louis, and turned around and drew another 75,000 in Kansas City the very next day. Surely John Elway can reel in some numbers on his home turf for Poor Ol' Straight Talk.

Four thousand. 4,000 people showed up to listen to this mess. Come on. Elway probably can't go shopping at the mall in Denver without attracting a few hundred gawkers, and the draw is only 4k at a campaign event?

Elway said McCain knows how to show "leadership and sacrifice for the good of the team."
Turning to the candidate, he said "It's the fourth quarter, and some have counted you out. But I know a thing or two about comebacks."

Elway urged everyone to vote. "We need to put someone in the White House who puts country first."

First, you know, go fuck yourself, Elroy. You would think a guy who went to Stanford might actually have a clue about the implications of continuing this pernicious little "McCain loves his country more than Obama" theme. But he's got his car dealerships and his new cheerleader wife, so it's all good. He's set, and nobody in Colorado will ever hold him accountable for anything he says, no matter how obnoxious or flat-out stupid. Don't be too surprised if a desperate Colorado GOP taps him for statewide office in the next few years.

But whatever. It's about what you'd expect from pro football players, most of whom just vote for whoever will take the smallest chunk of taxes out of their fat paychecks. The thing is, I'd bet money that the turnout would have been at least triple what it was if Palin had been scheduled to speak. She's their only draw now, because the campaign itself has no meaning, it's just a traveling American Idol, with an indistinguishable group of cartoonish morons at every stop.

Think about that: ten days out from Election Day, and one of the major-party candidates has been so overshadowed by his running mate, who was virtually unknown just a couple months ago, that he can't draw a decent crowd without her. He's gotta know what bad news that is for his prospects, and what that says about his tepid, shallow support, while Obama ground forces dwarf his in every state, red and blue alike. The way things are going, this election won't even be close enough for them to steal this time.

Nobody's voting for John McCain. They're either voting for the naughty librarian they think Sarah Palin is, or they're voting against what Limbaugh and Hannity have told them about Obama. For a guy that's spent a quarter-century in the US Senate, that's pretty damned sad.

Update: Hee hee. Suck it, Elway. Just fuckin' blow me long time. Real mature, I know. But still: Suck. It. Long. Time.