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Sunday, December 13, 2009

News of the World

Soooo....anything new happen with Tiger Woods' cock that I need to be apprised of? Because it is apparently of the utmost necessity that I know where he's been sticking that thing. Jesus, and we thought the coverage of Michael Jackson's death was ridonkulously over the top.

Incidentally, should the need ever arise for the planet to know everywhere mine was during my twenties, I'm working on a spreadsheet.

Meanwhile, the banksters' pillaging of the shell of the nation continues apace. We should all have been related to Bob Rubin, I guess, if we were expecting a fair shake.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

The MSM is always so focused. Gotta keep that circulation up, they don't want to end up as unemployed bloggers.

Wait 'til Cali turns into Bladerunnerville. That will run Tiger off of the front pages.

Santa, can I have some real hope and change for Christmas? Please?

Strix Cratylus said...

I must respectfully disagree! I have fantasized for years about someone smacking the fuck out of that overexposed bastard with one of his own golf clubs. The fact that it happened to be an enraged Valkyrie is just that much more entertaining.

But seriously, as I've said a few times already: I find it to be a truly fascinating picture of human nature. Most guys would consider his life to be heaven on earth. Who knows how many hundreds of millions of dollars for playing the most boring game on earth, people worldwide kissing his ass for being a walking, talking feel-good affirmation, and that wife! Come on, most guys we know would cut off their own dick and have it dipped in gold to hang above the mantel if they got to have sex with someone who looks like her, figuring they'd never be able to top that, so why not go out on top?

And yet, this stupid fuck still isn't content. The grass is always greener somewhere else. Ladies and gentlemen, the human fucking race. Gotta love it.