Sunday, June 13, 2010

California Drinking

Deep thought: the exquisite irony of eMeg "Griff Harsh V's proud mom" Whitman spending $71 million of her own money to peddle herself as the voice of fiscal responsibility, has it registered itself in her Ben Franklin fivehead yet? Obviously not, since eMeg is really no doubt positioning herself as a possible running mate for Mitt Romney's next tilt at the electoral windmill. It takes some real doing to make Jerry Brown look like the best choice, but by gawd she's done it in spades.

As for iCarly Fiorina, the less said the better. The weekend chatter 'mongst the "news" dipshits centers around iCarly's snotty pot-meet-kettle live-mike sniping at Barbara Boxer's hair, because that is the media we have.

And while Boxer is as uninspiring as they come, at least she doesn't have the "I lawn-darted HP and all I got were these ludicrous campaign commercials" albatross. Poor iCarly probably does really think that Sarah Palin's imprimatur will help, but she would probably get more cred with the endorsement of the ghost of former gubernatorial candidate Gary Coleman. Tom Campbell would have been a much better opponent for the Republicans to run, and might have actually won with some financial support, but since the GOP org in this state could find a way to fuck up a baked potato, they declined to even pretend to help him out. So they get what they got, which is a big bowl of wrong.

Forty million people in this fucking state, and these are the choices we have. No wonder we're imploding. It's going to be a long campaign season; I may have to pull an Elvis and just shoot my teevee by the fourth of July.


Marius said...

I guess now that I'm a Californian, I gotta pay attention to these things. To win the state, eMeg may need to buy it first; she's got less charisma than a wet blanket, and she enjoys being in her skin about as much as I'd love a colonoscopy. When iCarly asked for 50 grand for 'career counseling' from HP as they let her go, she should have hired an image consultant with that dough. With that haircut and demonic face, the only state where she could get elected is a federal disaster area. She looks like the love child of Barry Manilow and Bela Lugosi.

Heywood J. said...

Yes, unfortunately you do have to tune in, but as little as possible to preserve your sanity. The "good" thing, if there is one, is that all the players are well-known; you don't have to waste time trying to keep track of them.

eMeg and iCarly are both thoroughly, deeply unlikeable, both in personalities and political proclivities. That's about the only advantage that Brown and Boxer have, but it should be enough. The devil we know and all that.

As you point out, Fiorina's countenance and demeanor severely undermine the Repugs' usual "shrieking harridan" tack they would typically take toward Boxer. They really, really screwed the pooch by not supporting Tom Campbell, who is moderate and reasoned enough to pull a lot of swing voters.

All people care about this year are jobs, jobs, jobs, and iCarly's layoff record and snide-troll attitude don't move in that direction.