Monday, March 14, 2016


Remember Mark Burns, the huckster teevee-angelist hitching his pelf-powered gawwwd wagon to Drumpf's hair-don't? Well, apparently Burns was the opening act for the short-fingered vulgarian today, and took the time to implore well-known Christ-killer Bernie Sanders to convert to the one true belief, since everyone knows that we cain't haz a J-O-O fer preznit.

But wait, that's not the funny part of the story. This is the funny part:

Pastor Mark Burns, who spoke before Trump sat down for an interview with New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, said that the Vermont senator needed to be saved.

[emphasis mine]

Ahahaha. Oh, this is too good. All his life, Chris Christie has thought of himself as an alpha dog, and comported himself as such. He's the sort of shameless pol who makes every backroom deal he can, fucks people over out of spite, yet consistently bills himself as the most honest person in whatever room he's in. And he seems to sincerely believe it.

But he cast all that aside, doubling down, throwing his lot in with Fuckface Von Clownstick. It's fuck-or-walk time for Fatboy -- if Drumpf loses, Christie is done, as done as Rubio. Hell, even if Drumpf wins, there are no guarantees. Christie's doing this for an AG or cabinet appointment, but Clownstick's ethics are entirely situational. He expects loyalty from others, but promises none in return. If someone with more standing gives Drumpf an endorsement, and wants the same thing Christie does, then too bad for Christie.

And it couldn't happen to a nicer guy, or be more hilarious to watch. You could see it in Christie's eyes the day after he declared his endorsement, looking like Drumpf had Christie's family squirreled away somewhere on a private island.

No more alpha dog; Christie is now basically Reek from Game of Thrones. You can just imagine the mewling, cringing "interview" between them. Hope Chris brought the extra-strength kneepads, and maybe a roll of breath mints for afterward.

Which in turn reminds me of something interesting that Jonah Goldberg (for realz, yo) said the other day:

I’m losing the will to rebut Donald Trump’s “arguments” because he really doesn’t make any. First of all, most of his interviews are rapidly becoming as journalistically adversarial as the infomercial host asking, “Mr. Foreman, is it really true I’ll lose weight and save money by using the George Foreman grill?”

This. You can't help but wonder what sort of befuddled retard waits in line to be herded into an arena, only to be treated to this bullshit -- some holy-roller Jew-baiting snake-oil huckster, followed by a live infomercial. They might as well have stayed home and watched a Honey Boo Boo marathon.

That's the power of the orange beast -- he turns relatively moderate politicians like Christie into soulless, emasculated butt-boys, while career hacks like Goldberg suddenly realize what they've been a part of all these years, and what it's culminating in, and are finally beginning to grow a pair.

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