Thursday, October 13, 2005

The New Mantra

From this point on, whenever Dear Leader's gibbering visage darkens my poor television screen, whenever the faithful court stenographers report on one of his mighty deeds -- whether it's a canned videoconference with some of the folks fighting and dying for Bush's hallucinatory conversations with God....

....or whether he's taking a dump or a nap, the first thing I will be thinking is this:

I wonder if he cleared that with James Dobson.

Let it be our collective koan. Let it motivate us to drive all the troglodytes back to their fucking cave, and this time to roll the rock in front of the entrance.

Enough is enough. It's time to remind the Bushies that we're their bosses not their pets, and to remind the Dobsonites that in a free country, they are free to go fuck themselves.


Anonymous said...

Amen to that, Heywood. I'm amazed how the bow-tie conservatives, the Eastern Seaboard "elite" of the movement, hasn't yet begun to react with disgust to these narrow-minded religious freaks interfering so openly with what's supposed to be democratic politics. Funny how they like to bash Iran for being a mullahocracy, or whatever other barbarism they came up with these days, but don't want to take even a cursory look at their own mullahs dictating the course of the political process. In what way are the Redneck Pope, Dobson, or any of the other strident australopithecs out there on the right better than Iran's political clergymen? I'd like to know the answer to that question--and I'm not looking for "my God is better than their god"-type bullshit.

I ain't watching too much TV these days--no more digital cable, plus the pains of dealing with axiomatic set theory--but what is Chimpy McFlightsuit doing talkin' to a big-ass TV screen? Another one of his vile photo-ops (these things give me particular shudders of dread, seeing as I come from East Europe, where this shit used to be routine in the Eighties). What's he sayin' to those unusually white soldiers?

"Aloha, valiant clones. This is your emperor speaking. Welcome to the dark side. Now go fetch me some Ah mean, Johnny Walker. Pronto. And tell Andy Card to fix me a cheeseburger."


Heywood J. said...


There's nothing to be amazed about -- the think tank bow-ties are paid well to ignore the crazy aunt in the attic, or worse yet, to draw attention to the woodpeckers outside. What crazy aunt in the attic?

Push comes to shove, they'll point out that at least the American Taliban doesn't stone women or execute gays. This is true, but sometimes I can't help but wonder if it's only because the rest of us won't let them get away with it.

Whatever the case, as far as undue political influence is concerned, your point is absolutely on the money. It is unconscionable that unelected morons like Dobson, Falwell, and Robertson get consulted on important issues -- not once or twice, but apparently with some regularity. It's insane that it happens, and infinitely worse that the majority just accepts it.

Unless, of course, the majority really is on the side of such people, in which case maybe Canada or Costa Rica aren't such bad ideas.

Incidentally, Marius, I've been meaning to ask -- which Eastern European country is it that you're from, just out of curiosity? I have some Polish/Russian heritage, from just two generations back.

Heywood J. said...

Almost forgot, Marius. As far as news coverage of this canned abomination, using soldiers as props yet again, you're right, it was bullshit and harldy worth watching.

However, even though they haven't been as brutal as, say, you or I might like, the gloves are starting to come off. The fact that the rehearsal made it to air is pretty significant; the evisceration of Scott McClellan at the subsequent press conference (by a largely empty press room, even) is even more telling.

It may be too late to catch a rerun, but tonight Olbermann devoted the first 20 minutes to pure smackdown of this video nonsense. The responses of the soldiers are clearly rehearsed and regurgitated, and some unexpected laughs come when Dear Leader fumbles and drops his earpiece. Oh no!

Truly one of the most embarrassing things I've seen in some time, and Bush is little besides an utter embarrassment to every American paying attention.

Craig Heath said...

Heywood - re: Unless, of course, the majority really is on the side of such people, in which case maybe Canada or Costa Rica aren't such bad ideas.

An incisive article over on Harpers from a professed Christian points out how un-Christian we as a nation are in practice, but cites familiar statistics like the fact that 85% of Americans identify themselves as Christian (as compared to Israel, which is only 77% Jewish).

So it seems to me that the majority does sit in Dobson's bleachers, cheering for their bat-shit agenda to at least some degree (bricker-bracker! firecracker! sis-boom-bah! More Power! More Power! Rah! Rah! Rah!) So I can't help but think that this is why the Boy King is so heavily coached by these golums.

As the trenchant George Galloway said a couple weeks back on Bill Maher's show, "George Bush did not find God, he found the Party of God". That party got him this far, so is he gonna jump ship now? Unlikely.

And the AmTal doesn't stone women or gays today, but you'll notice that both of those groups are more and more persona non gratia all the time, no?

As to Chimpy and his video backup singers...has anyone in the media even asked why the thing was televised to begin with? If he wants to talk to soldiers and really hear what they think, it seems privacy would be in order, as I will assert that no soldier can tell you what he really thinks in TV-friendly language.

Of course it was a stunt, and we should know that even if we didn't get a peek behind the curtain and see the Wizard pulling the levers and pushing the buttons. But hey - I'll bet 85% of Americans bit and swallowed that big steel lure and set the treble hook deep into their fishy little lips.

Fish on!

Joon said...

One thing I've always admired about Billy Graham is that he's kept his nose in the pulpit and out of politics; I respect the man for that. But Billy isn't all about power, unlike ol' Dobber and his ilk.

Initially, money begets power, rarely the opposite, until the mechanism gets into self-perpetuation gear. I remember Pat "The Godfather" Robertson back in the days (early '70s) when he ran his humble TV evangelism operation by leaning out the upstairs bathroom window with a coathanger and a mic. (Hence, "Shout it from the Housetops", which, incidentally, can be had for a penny a copy from 5 different vendors over at Amazon).

Then the pledges poured in and dried up all the "love." The brimstone hit the fan and passionate Pat morphed into the bloated, bilious, bastard he's become--ordering contracts on foreign leaders and kissing the ring of office he used to claim would spawn the Anti-Christ.

My, how time and a boatload of money change things.

The "Don" is more interested in mining gold and diamonds these days than he is in mining souls. I recommend he be buried with as many jewels as he can carry out of this life with him. There won't be any waiting for him in the afterlife.

Enjoy your stuff. Keep in touch.


Anonymous said...

I'm from the only Latinate country in that area--Romania, that is. But I left it behind me some time ago, since the only true research community in my field (philosophy of natural science) is here, in North America. I was about 15 when the "revolutions" of 1989 (actually, a series of events carefully staged in Moscow, which luckily went horribly awry) occurred. It goes without saying that, politically, I was entirely naive at the time, and had no idea what those event meant, in world-historical terms. Then, I finished college and a master's in German Studies, then I worked for a couple of years in a cubicle (in order to to better enjoy "Office Space" and have some unmediated knowledge of what being a corporate drone is like). Afterwards, I went back to my studies in Italy and France, with another year spent in Manchester, England, where I was doing political philosophy. For about three years now I've been trudging along in a graduate program at a university on the East Coast, hoping to finish a dissertation that less than five other people are ever going to read.

But I do have a great deal of admiration for the Poles. They're probably the one people in East Europe (along with some Balts, I suppose) to which the greatest injustice has been done for about two centuries now, but that hasn't broken their spirit. You gotta respect that, especially when you come from a cocooned, suburban background in an affluent, secure Western society. Too bad American politicians don't have the decency to appreciate the selfless, unqualified loyalty they've got from the Poles for such a long time now.

I came here with a lot of hopes of encountering true freedom and authentic democracy, things that we badly missed back home. I remember how my grandfater, for about ten years after the end of WW2, used to go out at night with his buddies and flatten land in the cornfields--they were making landing strips for the Americans to come and save then from the yoke of Soviet oppression. Of course, Uncle Sam never bothered to come, much to our dismay. But that's another story. What shocked me so much to discover was that, under the present misadministration, I could see roughly the same sort of strong-armed, shameless kind of political tactics that the Soviets put to so much use--the unabashed manipulation of public opinion, the bullying of the mass-media, the disgusting, heavily-scripted photo-ops, the suppression of dissent, the knee-in-the-groins intimidation tactics--in short, all the bullshit that I thought I had safely left behind when I crossed the ocean. But no.

It's deeply ironic to see people who used to be such rabid anti-Communists here being led by the nose by means of dirty tactics the commies (and their allies on the other end of the spectrum, Italian fascists and German nazis) invented and honed to perfection more than half a century ago. Poetic justice, I guess we may call it--were it not for the unfortunate citizenry caught in the middle.

However, as long as you come across blogs like this one, and a few other I know, you get the impression that not everything is lost. At least that's what my heart tells me, although, in political terms, they don't amount to too much. Marx and Lenin, figures whom I hate but who knew a thing or two about politics, would say that a few blogs don't make class consciousness, and are far from being a relevant historical force. No matter. You guys keep doing what you do best. Blogging, I mean. I'm sure you must be very good at other things, too.


jurassicpork said...

Another Amen, Heywood. You have to also wonder, when Bush talks to God (or is it vice versa?), does he have to rehearse with standins first?

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