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Saturday, September 13, 2008

Special Needs Children

The reason Jonah Goldberg is deadly serious about pushing the lamest imaginable theories forward as irrefutable fact is a pretty simple one: he's a fucking moron. He probably has to wear a helmet when he blogs. Motherfucker has to wear either slip-on or velcro-strap shoes because he's too fucking dumb to tie them. And he counts on his audience to believe every stupid thing he says. More often than not, he's right about his audience. Clearly they'll believe anything.

If he was good at counting cards or memorizing addresses it'd be one thing, but he genuinely seems to have no marketable skill besides pulling things straight out of his ass. Get this, Pantload -- everyone knows that McCain is unable to raise his arms above his head to pitch a baseball with sufficient velocity to pitch a baseball. That is an entirely different kinesiological matter than being unable to type, even if you are some sort of moron who mounts the fucking keyboard at shoulder height. You who else can't type? Friend and enabler of Saddam and Osama (according to the people who bought Saxby Chambliss his Senate seat) Max Cleland.

Perhaps more than for any other specific reason, I despise this crowd's instinctive willingness to cynically use war injuries when it suits their purposes, while they belittle and calumniate wounded veterans when they turn out to be inconvenient to their political agenda. Eight years ago they started a whisper campaign that Johnny Mac's time in Charlie's tiger cage left him with snakes in his head, but this year's model is being bronzed alive by them. That's because they've never really fought for anything, and thus have no clue one way or the other. Nor do they care; it's just another cynical attempt to see if Rove and his fellow turd-burglars can regain their mojo and finish their grand project of ruining this country.

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