Saturday, January 09, 2016

This Land Is My Land

To exercise exclusive Legislation in all Cases whatsoever, over such District (not exceeding ten Miles square) as may, by Cession of particular States, and the Acceptance of Congress, become the Seat of the Government of the United States, and to exercise like Authority over all Places purchased by the Consent of the Legislature of the State in which the Same shall be, for the Erection of Forts, Magazines, Arsenals, dock-Yards, and other needful Buildings; -- US Constitution, Article 1, Section 8, Clause 17

It's difficult to find a single thing about the bird-sanctuary "militia" that's even remotely agreeable, save the basic notion that mandatory minimums are bad policy and worse justice. Not that any of these self-righteous clowns would oppose mandatory minimum sentences for, say, a low-level drug dealer (especially if they're black).

It's true that these are ridiculous people, clowns even. And all the Vanilla ISIS/Y'all Qaeda/Yokel Haram smackdown is fun. But these people are serious, and heavily armed, and deeply committed to their deranged vision. And the supposedly tyrannical federal gubmint keeps letting them get away with it.

There is nothing patriotic or respectable about these people and this movement. Cliven Bundy and his ilk are nothing but a bunch of freeloading peckerwoods who sponge off the same gubmint they profess to hate. The senior Bundy hasn't paid his grazing fees -- already one-tenth of private market value -- in over twenty years, which prompted the last standoff with these assholes. Ammon Bundy has a half-million dollar SBA loan on his business. Since the old racist has fourteen grown children, it's entirely likely that more of his burgeoning brood grift the taxpayers in one way or another, and complain about it the entire time.

I have a couple of modest suggestions. One is to cut them off financially, once and for all. The biggest problem the BLM has is its failure to react to any of these instances, whether from the Hammonds or the Bundys or whoever, in a timely fashion. Some of these cases have taken years to resolve, and Cliven Bundy is still overgrazing the federal land with his cattle, more than twenty years after he stopped paying his grazing fees.

So cut their subsidies, don't loan them any more money. Make them pay for their big pick-'em-up trucks with their own cash money, instead of cashing in on taxpayer-funded subsidies. I would rather pay $30/lb for steak than watch these cocksuckers and their fat wives preen in their F350's and $60k dually trucks. Build a fucking fence separating private ranch land from the federal land, and post armed rangers to maintain them. No more nearly-free public lands for you, assholes. Ammon Bundy talks a good game about the "people's land", but clearly he thinks it's his land, since his great-grandparents stole it from the native tribes fair and square. It's long past time to disabuse these idiots of their crazy notions. This is all very simple stuff.

The second suggestion revolves around Ammon Bundy's "negotiating" posture, which resembles that of such classic organizations as Hezbollah and Hamas. Consider:  Bundy is demanding that the Malheur refuge be "returned" to the ranching, logging, and mining interests who are chomping at the bit to exploit it, as if those interests haven't been doing so elsewhere, mostly royalty-free. Bundy also demands that the Hammonds be released, even though the Hammonds themselves have disavowed any association with Bundy and his group. Bundy also demands that he and his group be allowed free passage back home whenever they run out of beef jerky and decide they're tired of spooning each other to stay warm.

So:  transfer of disputed territories; release of political prisoners; safe passage. How is this not like every Muslim terrorist group?

Perhaps the linchpin of cognitive dissonance for these morons is the simultaneous insistence that Obama is a tyrannical thug, but is also a pussy. These people also seem to admire strongmen types like Vladimir Putin.

Well, let's make something clear, for the kids in the cheap seats -- in a tyranny, these assholes would already be dead. Putin, for example, would have given them a choice of surrender or die, and sent in a Spetsnaz squad after about 12 hours. They would not have had an entire week to groom their beards and bleg for jerky on their Twitter feeds. And don't even ask what would have happened if they were black.

Strike one was letting them get away with a massive armed standoff with federal agents a couple years ago. This episode is clearly not about (or not just about) the justice of imprisoning Dwight and Steven Hammond a second time for the same crime. This is an attempt to foment an armed insurrectionist movement; this is borderline treason. This cannot stand.

So far, the feds have shown admirable restraint in letting these bozos sit there in the fire-watch tower and do their thing. But they need to start shutting it down, closing the access roads, shutting off the electricity and internets access, and making these losers live with their choice for as long as they can hold out. And then they need to go to jail for a while, of for no other reason than to make sure no one else has any bright ideas. But the fact is that they are armed domestic terrorists, and should start being treated as such.

If Ammon Bundy and his dipshit friends aren't pushing ass out of Club Fed this time next year, then Obama really is a pussy.

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