Monday, August 27, 2007

Slow Children At Play

Rising Hegemon has one of the most painfully funny clips in some time. No doubt she has a fine future ahead of her at Fox News, if she doesn't get completely distracted by something shiny first. But seriously, I defy you to transcribe her incoherent babbling, and then to make sense of it. She talks for 25 seconds, and literally makes no sense whatsoever even for, like, you know, a second or such like. I don't think any of us were expecting the Gettysburg Address, but jeebus.


woodguy said...

I don't want to nitpick (OK, I do) but what's with kids' names these days? I mean Lauren Caitlin? What ever happened to Sue and Mary? I think it would be better if we raised more kids with less exotic sounding names who possessed at least a modicum of intelligence.

Perhaps she aspires to be the first GOP woman candidate for president, following in our fearless decider's tiny footprints. Such large shoes, so small a brain.

Marius said...

Yeah, I share Woodguy's worries. Girls named Taylor, anyone? Campbell? Hayden? WTF?

Do the moronic parents who give them boys' names think a male-sounding designator gives daddy's girl a better chance in this man's world, or what? For that's what they must be thinking -- male names are still, on the whole more desirable/prestigious than girl's names. For, if it weren't so, you'd see parents calling their little boys Carmen, Conchita, Sally and Mary. But nobody does that, right?

In post-industrial America, being a man is still better than pretty much everything else out there.

Heywood J. said...

I also saw a photo of the top five finalists, one of which was this dingbat. One of the other girls was also named Kaitlin (not 100% sure on spelling, but it definitely began with a K). It's bit trendy and played out, but the ones that really bug me are the ones Marius mentions, which are surnames. It's not just the asexuality of the name I find irritating, but the fact that they are conventionally not first names.

Then again, I always thought Frank Zappa had a way with names.

But name games aside, it is just disturbing that a person can get that far in life and be so incredibly incoherent, literally on the level of a pre-schooler. You can't even attribute it to stage fright; most of these girls are groomed from early on to be poised and prepared.

Her parents should march down to the school and ask for their money back, and then use that money to buy, like, um, y'know, a map and some books?