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Thursday, February 10, 2005

Jeff Gannon, International Twink Of Mystery

We've been covering this "Jeff Gannon" thing since the get-go. We knew it was gonna be good. We just didn't think it could possibly be this good.

Let's see -- he's a ringer from a "news agency" run by a Texas GOP delegate, which has suddenly flushed his articles down the ol' memory hole; he's been using a pseudonym, even to get his White House press credentials -- which sounds just slightly like a federal offense in this new century of fear; he's got a problem with paying his taxes; and apparently he runs several gay websites.

Now, that last one doesn't mean much to us here at the Hammer. We don't give a shit what consenting adults do behind closed doors. The SpongeBob Brigade just might have a problem with this photo, though.

So to you, Jim Guckert (rhymes with "pillow-biter"), we salute you. We salute your bravery in posing in nothing but your underwear and dog tags with a "come hither bring your ball-gag" look. We salute your ability to get a White House press credential without even a rudimentary background check. But most of all, we salute the extreme height to which your hypocritical "I'm such a moral Christian" petard has been hoisted.

Petard. Hoist. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

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