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Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Schmuck Radio

I agree with this guy about firing Imus, but let's face it, these things are almost always financial decisions. I'm the last person to stick up for a putz like Imus, and regardless of what he's actually saying at any given time, I don't even get how people can listen to his heavy-breathing-galoot-working-a-lollipop voice in the first place, but that's me.

But come on, before anyone proclaims this as some sort of moral victory, we should be honest about a few things. Imus has been doing this crap forever, and somebody's been listening to it. Someone is keeping that drug-addled piece of shit Limbaugh on the air, ditto Coulter, Hannity, and the rest of the Horst Wessel Gang. Imus was just giving the goobers what they really want, apparently, occasionally leavening the schtick with the veneer of legitimacy given him by street-pimp politicos and nappy-headed journo-hos (uh-oh, there goes my sweet, sweet PMSNBC simulcast) parading through to pimp their unreadable books. People are too busy hatin' the playa, and not focusing enough on the game -- or, for that matter, the fans.

I mean, really, whose leg will L'il Russ have to hump when he gets around to telling us what a Serious and Objective Observer of politics he is? I'm sure the guys on the Morning Zoo program won't recognize how important he is, and that way lies madness big, sweaty fun. A couple of fart noises and "which Desperate Housewife would you bang" questions from the zoo crew, and Pumpkinhead's going to go all Cousin Eddie on them.

I just hope there's video when it happens.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Word.

I just got done trading top-of-the-lung tirades with wingnuts who are convinced that this, along with the Duke lacrosse case, are examples of how Whitey's always gettin' a raw deal.

I tried consistency, saying that I didn't think Imus should be fired just like I didn't think the Dixie Chicks should have gotten the shit they got (unlike the idiots I was arguing with, who would have been happy to see them sent to Gitmo).

I tried ridicule, mocking an old Goldwater conservative for what poor old Barry would think of seeing his descendents becoming servile eunuch apologists for state power, who stood mute with their dicks in hand while Dear Leader repeatedly wiped his ass with the Constitution, only to get all Patrick Henry over their right to insult black people.

Re: the Duke case, I tried sarcasm, saying "In other news, Emmet Till is still dead". I said that while the particulars of the case are certainly terrible, it's always terrible when people are falsely accused of a crime. I said that the only reason they even cared about this case was because it was a black girl accusing white boys (damn niggers got one over on us!), but that in any event, they at least have the chance to move on with their lives with their names cleared, unlike, say, countless black men in the Jim Crow south accused of raping white women, who didn't even have the luxury of a crooked trial with an incompetent lawyer, what with the savage beating and hanging at the hands of a lynch mob and all.

Finally, I just realized that I'm just arguing against perceptions and feelings, about as pointless as arguing about an inkblot test. Actual evidence is secondary, and it can always be manufactured. The important thing is that they're being persecuted, goddamnit! No one thinks watermelon and fried chicken jokes are appropriate anymore! They have to acknowledge the existence of other people and (publicly) pretend to give a shit about how they feel! What did Job know of suffering compared to them?

So yeah, I know where rancid bags of pus like Imus and Rush and Glenn Beck and the Savage Weiner get their listeners from, and I see things like this as a Pyrrhic victory at best. One guy's career might be screwed up, but it just adds to the simmering martyr complex that guarantees an audience for the next one. Not to mention the actual free speech issue, which is real even if the bulk of defenders in this case are being just a tad inconsistent overall.

I have no idea what to do about issues like this, although my thumbnail sketch of a plan would be to allow the shitheads to say whatever they want to their audience, but every so often, drag them into a serious setting and force them to participate in a structured debate with an opponent who actually knows what they're talking about - no ad hominems, no "Cut his mic!", no irrelevant tangents, but a real debate, where they can be clinically dismantled and made to look like the shallow, posturing blowhards they are when taken out of their element. Just to remind the base what happens when fantasy collides with reality.