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Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Predators

Everybody's heard about the tiger attack at the SF Zoo by now. It's in all the papers and everything.

The rampage began about 20 minutes just after the zoo closed at 5 p.m. Tuesday, while dozens of visitors were still milling about inside. The animal apparently escaped from the grotto, attacked the first man near its enclosure, then proceeded about 300 yards to the Terrace Cafe restaurant, where it mauled the other two victims.


The word "rampage", while technically accurate, connotes a marauding, unpredictable force tearing through all in its path and causing massive amounts of damage. And yet the tiger actually got out of its enclosure (how has not yet been determined, but there's bound to be a story there as well) and did what tigers do, and made it all of 300 yards away from its enclosure before being shot. Tragic, but is it really a "rampage"?

Unfortunately the tiger was female, so there is no penis to harvest for impotent, superstitious morons, but I'm sure the other parts and organs have lots of cool magickal "properties" as well.

Maybe this qualifies as a "rampage":

OMAHA, Nebraska (AP) -- A man killed two women and left their bodies in the basement of a house, then beat and raped the daughter of one of the victims in the same home, authorities and a relative of the victims said.

Fabian Hands, 46, was booked on two counts of homicide and two counts of use of a weapon to commit a felony.

Officers were called to the house in north Omaha Monday night. When they arrived, a 20-year-old woman came out of a bedroom and said she had been sexually assaulted.

Hands followed her out of the bedroom and assaulted her in front of officers, according to a police report. Officers subdued him and took him into custody.


What do these stories have in common? I dunno, one animal killed a couple of people for no goddamned reason, and the other one's a freakin' tiger. Shame that, unlike the tiger, Hands was not shot during his rampage.

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