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Sunday, January 09, 2005

When A "Big Tent" Really Means "Lots Of Clowns"

Michelle Malkin, she of the windblown blog photo and antidisestablishmentarian (that is, so professedly un-PC she's really PC) vehemence, weighs in with a pronunciamento supporting the clucking hen groups who forced rapper/rocker/Pam Anderson sharer-of-fluids Kid Rock from the upcoming inauguration festivities. (Apparently Jenna and Barbara are big fans of The Kid. Who'da thunk it?)

It's a Sista Souljah moment to bring a tear to my one good eye, let me tell you. And to judge not only by Malkin's estimable commentariat, but other playas in the right-wing blogosphere like Protein Wisdom (who is absolutely hilarious, politics aside), it's not a terribly popular move. For one, there's that whole freedom of speech thing, and everyone knows that only PC libs actively curtail free expression.

Malkin, as is her wont, defends herself by displaying the most profane and offensive of the Kid Rock oeuvre, as if KR were planning on starting with Fuck U Blind and ending with Pimp Of The Nation.

Now, I'm no KR fan; I believe that the last decent song he did was Bawitdaba, and I have no clue as to what a fuckin' "bawitdaba" is. But it had a good beat, and you could dance to it, Dick. A better reason to mau-mau the Kid would be because he -- ¿como se dice? -- sucks. Like his ex on Tommy Lee or Bret Michaels. He's a lame poseur -- a cracker from Detroit who can't seem to decide whether he's a homey, yo, or a Confederate longing for the good ol' days when Lynyrd Skynyrd could lynch Neil Young and get paid for it.

Anyway, that leaves the hipster party with the usual choices of Pat Boone or the Statler Brothers or something. Maybe they can talk Ricky Martin into it again, though he may have seen the light on these guys with the whole gay marriage thing.

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